Lois & Clark:
The New Adventures of Superman

Season Two

Madame Ex

Lois and Clark learn that the city's anti-Metropolis feeling is stirred up by the former Mrs. Luthor, who's a lot closer to them than they suspect.

Starting off with a dud, we see a show in which Luthor's criminal activities were never revealed to the public, Superman was apparently present when Luthor died (Blake and Jackson are retconning or they just didn't watch episode 21), and newspaper anagrams can change people's opinions on anything. Having tried this myself (spelling APRIL FOOL) in an article in the local paper just five months earlier and failed, this especially didn't gel for me. Emma Samms is dreadful in her "celebrity villain" role. GRADE: D-

Wall of Sound

An underground rock star takes a day job as the Sound Man, using ultrasonics to engineer his crimes.

TPTB promise celebrity guest stars, they give us Michael Des Barres as a rock n' roll bad guy. At times, the actors are having so much fun you can't help but play along, but overall, this is a considerable waste of energy. GRADE: C-

The Source

A plan to sabotage Metropolis's power is relayed to Lois, but her informant has vanished.

A standout from others of this time due to the lack of a guest villain, "The Source" does have some interesting exploration of newspaper ethics (Lois refusing to reveal a source), but the main plot is a little confusing, and the Kents' placement on the threatened Metropolis subway is awfully convenient. GRADE: C+

The Prankster

A villain who Lois ensured was put away years ago leaves prison with plans to humiliate her and destroy the Daily Planet.

A pretty good script, a threat from Lois's past and a new villain from the comics should have added up to a real treat, but Bronson Pinchot damns the production with his overacting. The simple solution of Superman blocking the laser blast ends the hour like a damp sponge. GRADE: C

Church of Metropolis

The criminal cartel called Intergang establishes a foothold in Metropolis now that Luthor isn't around to keep them out and leader Bill Church tries to blackmail Superman via the promise of death to his friends. Meanwhile, Clark meets Assistant DA Mayson Drake and finds her strangely opposed to Superman...but attracted to him.

It took a while, but at last we have a good episode this season! Another comic book creation, the underground criminal group Intergang, makes their first of five appearances this year. Bill Church, underplayed by Peter Boyle, is a great villain, and Bruce Weitz, threatening Superman, looks like a man on the edge. GRADE: A

Operation Blackout

Clark and Lois impersonate military personnel when a supposedly dead acquaintance from Lois's college days returns with a plan to take over a government satellite.

A forgettable hour, with nothing standing out of note other than this week's celebrity, Charles Rocket. Dean Cain looks sharp in a military uniform. GRADE: C-

That Old Gang of Mine

Clones of Capone, Dillinger, Bonnie and Clyde cause chaos in Metropolis, particularly when Clark is gunned down in front of dozens of witnesses and must play dead.

Until Eugenie and Brad came along in season three, this was hands-down the worst hour of the series. Why would anyone want to clone these mobsters? How did they get permission from the estates to get the proper genetic information? Why does Capone's clone have a scar? Why do the mobsters insist on dressing in 20s clothes? Why doesn't anyone notice the lack of blood when Clark is shot and plays dead? Why does William Devane play Capone like Milton Berle's Louie the Lilac on "Batman?" GRADE: F

A Bolt from the Blue

A graveyard incident duplicates Superman's abilities in the body of an older fellow who uses them for personal gain, while the mysterious scientist from an earlier episode sees a way to use them to revive Luthor...

Oh, look, it's Leslie Jordan again, and in spandex this time, with Superman's powers! At this stage in the season, I was wondering why I wasn't watching "The Simpsons." GRADE: D

Season's Greedings

Winslow Schott, the Toyman, starts a Christmas craze for "Atomic Space Rats" loaded with an otherwise harmless chemical that makes people greedy.

"Greedings" reminded me and redeemed the series. Cain's script nails the characterization of Lois and Clark for the first time this year, and Sherman Helmsley is a fabulous Toyman. It suffers from predictable holiday mushiness and the Toyman's conversion is cloying, but it's nice to see a super villain not really evil for once. GRADE: B+

Metallo

Superman meets a cyborg powered by kryptonite stolen from LexCorp. Its creators think kryptonite is a power source and are unaware of the stone's effect on Superman.

Wham! A truly great episode, with two onscreen super powered fights, a comic book villain, the first really inventive use of kryptonite (the Vales try it as a power source and do not know its effects on Superman), some great Lois and Clark interaction, Lane Smith playing Perry perfectly when he calls Lois on the carpet, Roxana Zal's great job as Lucy Lane, and, as if it wasn't perfect enough already, Christian Clemenson shows up. GRADE: A+

Chi of Steel

When Perry's mens club is invaded, Lois investigates its inherent sexism while Superman finds his own energy being turned against him by a warrior with mystic bracelets.

A lot of people actively dislike this episode because the ninja throws Superman around a lot, but this actually makes sense when you consider the principle of using an opponent's strength and kinetic energy against them. It remains baffling that an episode that spends so much time trying to "correct" sexism could be as insensitive to Asians as this one. GRADE: C

The Eyes Have It

Caught while ransacking Lois's apartment for his stolen property, Dr. Light turns a laser on Superman, leaving him blinded.

The "blind" episode is another Hollywood staple, but Cain avoids the potential for near-slapstick flailing, which not even David Janssen could pull off. Dr. Light is goofy but forgettable. GRADE: B-

The Phoenix

Lex Luthor is revived and plans to rebuild his former financial empire and get kryptonite from currently the only known source: the cyborg arm of Metallo's creator.

Luthor's resurrection is flawed from the moment he starts losing hair. There's a lot of great material here and the investigation into Nigel's background fascinating, but it remains tragic that TPTB decided to have Luthor concentrate on Lois rather than rebuilding a criminal empire, a potentially far more interesting move for the character. GRADE: B-

Top Copy

A TV reporter on the Intergang payroll sets out to learn Superman's identity, and when she seems set to fail, resorts to giving Superman a kiss with kryptonite-coated lips.

"Someone discovering Superman's identity" is already becoming a cliche by this point, but McNamara's skillful use of Intergang, and Racquel Welch's terrific performance, elevate the episode. The kryptonite poisoning is a good idea. GRADE: B

Return of the Prankster

The Prankster escapes, and, with a modified version of Dr. Light's laser, makes a bid to kidnap the president.

Bronson Pinchot again goes waaaay over the top for an hour, but this time he doesn't even have a very good script to play with. The very notion of a criminal getting that close to a presidential motorcade is patently absurd, said your humble author, whose parents both drove for President Bush's team whenever he visited Atlanta and completely shut down 14 lanes of I-75. At least it contains the memorable line "Steel don't bounce." GRADE: D

Lucky Leon

Jimmy is implicated in a murder engineered by an Intergang lackey who is using cameras hidden in desktop screen phones in his bid to steal a nuclear device.

Ruppenthal's 2nd season stories are both of a far higher quality than his later work. "Leon" is a simple Intergang story told well, with excellent continuity, believable villains and great interaction between our heroes, whose first date is played very well. Mayson Drake's surprise death at the end is a real shock. GRADE: A-

Resurrection

Lois and Clark follow up on the late Mayson Drake's last case: the reappearance of supposedly dead criminals. Also on the case, DEA agent Dan Scardino, who begins to pursue Lois.

The interesting concept of criminals getting away after "dying" (done before in the "Avengers" episode "Bizarre" but not as well) is almost ruined by the presence of DEA Agent Dan Scardino, an irksome character who annoyingly sticks around for several episodes to woo Lois. Coming so soon after Lois and Clark's date and their tentative happiness, this roadblock is quite irritating. GRADE: C

Tempus Fugitive

H.G. Wells arrives in Metropolis after a detour to the future, where a psychopath named Tempus has joined him and plans to subvert history by killing the infant Superman shortly after his rocket crashlanded on Earth.

The first Tempus story is a real treat, although the sub-"Back to the Future" time travel hokum isn't as fun as either Tempus or Lois's temporary learning of Clark's identity. Tempus is an excellent villain, well played by Lane Davies and this story is notable for introducing the phrase "galactically stupid" to L&C lore. GRADE: B+

Target: Jimmy Olsen!

It transpires that Jimmy Olsen was one of several children injected shortly after birth with a device that would make him a "sleeper" agent for his country, should the time arise. When criminals learn of the defunct project, they take control of him and two others his age.

A fair treatment of "programmed killers," which Grant Rosenberg would do a better job with in season 3. Michelle Phillips goes as over the top as possible with her character, and Justin Whalen finally convinced most of fandom that he's an acceptable Jimmy. GRADE: C+

Individual Responsibility

Bill Church Jr, the new head of Intergang, uses newly discovered red kryptonite on Superman and learns that it makes him aloof and uncaring. Lois advises him to see a psychiatrist.

Bruce Campbell, Intergang, red kryptonite and psychotherapists mix to make one of the best episodes of the season. There's not a dull minute and the dialogue is flawless. GRADE: A

Whine, Whine, Whine

Superman rescues a hopeless musician from certain death, but sprains the musician's arm in the process. The guitarist sues Superman for wrongful injury and he and Lois search for one honest lawyer to represent him.

If you can get past the musician's sorry accent, this is a great story that expresses outrage at American society's lust for lawsuits. Lois finally ejects Scardino from the show, and Adam West and Frank Gorshin (the 1960s Batman and Riddler) get cameos. GRADE: A-

And the Answer Is...

Clark is ready to reveal all to Lois, but he is delayed by a criminal who has already learned his identity and kidnapped his parents, threatening to murder them unless Superman does his bidding.

What would sadly be Blake and Jackson's last effort sees the Kents kidnapped and Clark's identity discovered again, but it's still a fast-paced, exciting episode, made all the more tense by Clark's desperation for his family and his desire to tell Lois his secret. Nigel's demise is a bit sad, as it robs the show of a great character. On the other hand, Superman isn't using his brain. If he knows his parents are in a lead-lined room, then why not just scour the city for those places he *can't* x-ray through? GRADE: B